“Late Night time with Jimmy Kimmel” opened with the host packing up his office to leave the country because he fears a second Donald Trump administration. Kimmel has been a vocal—and humorous—critic of convicted felon and now President-elect Donald Trump, and suspects himself to be on Trump’s record of enemies.
Kimmel’s sidekick, Guillermo Rodriguez, comes upon the scene and pleads for him to remain saying, “You have a very important voice.” However after convincing Kimmel to do the present, Guillermo reveals he’s heading again to Mexico.
“More than half of this country voted for the criminal who’s planning to pardon himself for his crimes,” Kimmel says in his opening monologue.
“I guess this election wasn’t rigged. It’s weird, though, right? He said it would be rigged,” Kimmel provides, mentioning that after years of election-fraud claims—and even Trump’s makes an attempt to say the election was rigged on Election Day—he and his MAGA celebration are conspicuously silent about all of it now.
“Donald Trump is just like the emperor from Star Wars,” Kimmel jokes. “He’s all evil and he keeps coming back with no reasonable explanation whatsoever.”
“Let’s be trustworthy. It was a horrible night time final night time,” Kimmel continues. “It was a terrible night for women, for children, for the hundreds of thousands of hardworking immigrants who make this country go, for health care, for our climate, for science, for journalism, for justice, for free speech. It was a terrible night for poor people, for the middle class, for seniors who rely on Social Security, for our allies in Ukraine, for NATO, for the truth and democracy and decency.”
But it surely’s deeper than that, Kimmel explains. “And it was a horrible night time for everybody who voted towards them. And guess what? It’s a dangerous night time for everybody who voted for him, too. You simply do not understand it but.”
“But it was a really good night for Putin and for polio,” Kimmel reminds the audience. “And for lovable billionaires like Elon Musk and the bros up in Silicon Valley and all the wriggling brain worms who sold what was left of their souls to bow down to Donald Trump.”
“My solely request to President-elect Trump is that he let me share a jail cell with Taylor Swift. I am actually good at making bracelets, and I believe we would get alongside simply effective,” Kimmel jokes. “We’ll see how funny that is in six months.”
