Former congressman, briefly practising lawyer, alleged baby intercourse trafficker, and confirmed soundbite-chaser Matt Gaetz withdrew from consideration as Donald Trump’s lawyer normal amid a brand new allegation of intercourse with a minor on Thursday. The transfer instantly sparked robust reactions and predictions about what comes subsequent for him.
However this isn’t a narrative about what comes subsequent for Gaetz. Within the 15 days because the presidential election was known as for Trump, he’s unleashed a barrage of unserious nominees for his Cupboard. A shocking variety of Trump’s TV-alumni dream crew members are steeped in scandal, very like Expensive Chief himself, and are crumbling below essentially the most nominal of scrutiny—which makes you surprise if Staff Trump is aware of learn how to do a Google.
With Gaetz out of the way in which, which junk drawer nominee will probably be taken down by their very own nonsense subsequent?
RELATED STORY: Watch Jimmy Kimmel mock Trump’s ridiculous Cupboard picks
Pete Hegseth, Protection secretary
The Fox Information host—who was flagged by his fellow servicemen as an “insider threat”—is Trump’s decide to run the Pentagon, although that was introduced earlier than allegations surfaced that he was accused of rape by a fellow Republican in 2017 and paid an undisclosed sum to his alleged sufferer to make all of it go away. On Wednesday, the police report was launched, and it’s horrific.
RELATED STORY: Trump’s protection decide would not wash his arms—and 17 different ghastly info
Robert F. Kennedy Jr., Well being and Human Providers secretary
The namesake of the beloved second son of Camelot is a household pariah who joined the Trump marketing campaign in October after folding his personal ridiculous run for the nation’s high workplace. At present Trump’s decide to go up Well being and Human Providers, the mind worm-havin’, bear cub dumpin’, whale head haulin’, chemtrail embracin’ antivaxxer additionally has some not-so-sexy scandals of his personal. And on Thursday, CNN’s KFILE revealed RFK Jr. blasted “Hitler” Trump and his “outright Nazi” MAGA supporters.
RELATED STORY: Mike Pence hates RFK Jr. too—however for such a Mike Pence cause
Gov. Kristi Noem, Homeland Safety secretary
This famed dog-killer from North Dakota is banned on all tribal lands within the state she guidelines with an iron fist, and allegedly cheated on her husband with Trump’s beloved adviser Corey Lewandowski. Heading up Homeland Safety might be a candy reward for Noem enduring Trump’s 39-minute dance get together in October.
Linda McMahon, Training secretary
This billionaire daughter-slapper constructed the World Wrestling Leisure empire with husband, Vince McMahon. 4 years after her disastrous flip as head of the Small Enterprise Administration below Trump 1.0, she’s again to body-slam the Division of Training, regardless of beforehand mendacity about her utter lack of schooling in schooling. Predictably, she comes along with her personal baggage: She’s been accused of enabling a sexual predator who abused underage “ring boys” for many years.
Mehmet Oz, Facilities for Medicare and Medicaid Providers administrator
Dr. Phil’s solely true competitor for the title of “Worst TV Doctor” is again within the political highlight two years after his disastrous carpetbagging try to flip a Senate seat in Pennsylvania. Whereas Dr. Ozdoesn’t appear to have any sexual assault allegations holding him again, he is a recognized quack who took a web page out of the Alex Jones playbook and made hundreds of thousands via dietary supplements he pushed on his viewers with a facet of junk science.
Former Rep. Sean Duffy, Transportation secretary
Maybe the least well-known of Trump’s roster of camera-chasing Cupboard picks, this unproductive congressional quitter’s IMDb web page kicks off with an early season of MTV’s “The Real World” and two seasons of that community’s “Road Rules,” the place he introduced himself as a laidback lumberjack from Wisconsin. Since leaving his low-paying gig within the Home mid-term in 2019, Duffy and his “Real World” alumna spouse have saved a roof over the pinnacle of their 9 kids by shrieking right-wing speaking factors on Fox Information.
RELATED STORY: Trump faucets ‘Highway Guidelines’ has-been to run the nation’s roads
Former Rep. Tulsi Gabbard, director of nationwide intelligence
This Hawaii congressperson-turned-Democratic presidential candidate-turned former Democrat is reviled for palling round with Syrian dictator Bashar al-Assad and echoing Kremlin speaking factors like a toddler studying to cuss.
Elon Musk, co-head of made-up division named after a meme
This sketchy South African native is the world’s richest man, even after pouring gobs of cash into Trump’s marketing campaign and working the city sq. previously referred to as Twitter into the bottom. Transphobic as hell and much more anti-labor, this black-clad billionaire is a recognized tax-dodger who pretends to discovered progressive firms. Musk has been virtually glued to the president-elect’s facet since Election Day, a lot to his cadre of nepo-babies’ dismay.
RELATED STORY: First indicators of backlash? Trump sidelines Musk at toothless fee
That is only a partial record of Trump’s disastrous deliberate Cupboard, however we don’t have all day—and if we record all of them, another person would possibly withdraw earlier than we’re carried out.
RELATED STORY: Even this infamous GOP jerk thinks Trump’s Cupboard is nuts
So what say you? Who would be the subsequent junk drawer decide to fall?
